Dear *Soldier*,
I think I'm gonna finish my Certification in time before I come up there! :) I finished Units 18 & 19 today. Completely. Tomorrow's Unit includes a 700 word research article, a lesson plan, and some essay questions... I am not looking forward to it, but I think it's gonna be good. Maybe I can sorta celebrate getting my cert at the same time you're celebrating completing basic training, yay! ;) Anyway, I still have to finish Unit 20... and since tomorrow is my last day working for a week or so, I have 4 session scheduled as well. Plus I need to do laundry and clean my room, the house, etc... your mom's coming and I know mom's a little bit stressed about it, so I want to help her out a bit by cleaning up around the house. She's embarrassed by this house... she even started looking at a few other houses because she wants to consider other places to live. She's decided she really doesn't like all this land after all because of how much work it is to maintain, lol. Plus she hates this house, she thinks it's ugly... too bad they've spent so much money fixing it up already, though. Anyway I don't know what they'll do, both my parents are under a lot of stress and they were fighting a bit today. :(
It's super late but I just ate a pistachio muffin (the last "cheating" thing I'll eat before back to calorie restriction tomorrow)... so now I feel like I should stay up more to let it digest... I'm not eating before my sessions, and they're back to back, so hopefully these calories last me, haha. Moving on, I know you don't care that much about the specifics of my diet, lol.
Um... I got to talk to you on the phone today! It was a real roller coaster... at first it was exciting and happy, and then that turned to disappointment when you said you didn't have much time, and then I asked my questions in a panic and wasn't really finished when you said you had to go... I felt really unsettled and bothered... I even cried. I felt like maybe you didn't miss me because you sounded so cold... and I thought maybe you didn't have enough time because you had called other people first... :'( So I was really hurt and stuff, but then I realized that probably wasn't true but I just didn't know WHAT to think and I COULDN'T talk to you about it... so I went to talk to a friend of mine who has dated at least two guys in the military and went through this TWICE... lol. I explained exactly what happened and how I felt about it and what worried me and she told me it was totally normal and that you're just THAT tired and that you really are excited to see me you just don't have the energy to show it, etc. She also said you probably had that time originally, or were supposed to have that time, but someone messed it up for you somehow. Anyway, talking to her made me feel better, and I also looked at some time stamp stuff and realized you called me first thing after you updated your Facebook post so I was feeling better, but still not great... and THAT'S when you CALLED AGAIN! :D I was honestly floored. I was so ecstatic that I got ANOTHER phone call from YOU! Anyway I'm sure you remember I asked about how tired you were and about how you felt and how your weekend was hard and everything, and getting to do that validated what my friend had told me, and I actually could hear in your voice that you wanted to see me... plus, I mean, you called ME. Again. Instead of someone else... that really meant the world to me, I can't even tell you. I feel kind of like a selfish bitch wanting all your time but you have so little to give and I feel like I need it the most... but anyway. That's why I offered to let you call someone else the second time... I'm glad I could give you that opportunity this time. And I'm so so glad you called me because it validated that I'm important to you-- and HOW important I am to you... and that's exactly what I needed to know. I am just beside myself now with excitement and joy... the way I SHOULD feel, leading up to your graduation, so I am ever so grateful and happy! I love you, Puppy!
By the way, I should tell you that I'm not planning on writing out these last few letters... first of all, I don't think I'll have the time, and secondly, I don't think it'll matter as much to you... thirdly, I can write more when I type than I can when I'm writing... lol. I should tell you that for the duration of your training I both hand-wrote and typed every single letter that I sent... Some nights when it wasn't convenient to sit at the table and write, so I just typed the letter on my laptop and then penned it the next day. Some nights I did the opposite-- penned it and then typed it up before sending it. Some nights I did both in one sitting. The last few days I've not had any extra time to hand write so I hope you'll understand and appreciate getting all my handwritten letters and I hope you won't think any less of these typed out ones... :x Either way, I'm still writing one a day!
I love you with all my heart and I can't wait to be in your arms,
Cherry Girl <3
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